It’s 1 AM.
The house is quiet,
the world is asleep,
and I’m sitting here on this chair…
the same chair where memories sit heavier than my own body.
And suddenly,
in the middle of this still night,
I imagine her walking into my silence
not physically, but the way she always did…
softly, like a thought that knows exactly where to land.
She sits across from me,
looks at me with those familiar eyes,
and then she begins to speak.
Her voice in my head says…
I really wanna hug you.
Not just for a few seconds.
Not the polite kind where you pat my back
and pretend you’re okay.
No…
I want you to hold me.
Really hold me.
I want you to squeeze your arms around me
and pull me closer
than you ever thought humanly possible.
Her voice trembles here,
but she continues…
“I want my face buried in your chest.
I want to know your scent like it’s my own.
I want to remember how it feels
when your heartbeat matches mine
without either of us trying.”
She leans in,
whispering a confession I never got to hear in reality:
“I want you to slowly rub my back
the way you used to…
like you were saying a thousand things
without a single word.
I want you to kiss my forehead
that soft, lingering kiss
that made me feel like home.”
And then, with a breath that feels like a prayer:
“And when I think you’re going to pull away…
I want you to hug me tighter.
Tighter than you ever did.
Like you don’t want to let me go again.
Because truth is…
I just want to hug you
for a really, really long time.”
The room is silent again.
But her words stay.
Her presence stays.
Her warmth stays
if not in arms,
then in memory.
And I sit here at 1 AM,
holding onto a moment
that exists only in imagination…
yet feels more real
than anything I’ve touched in months.
Some people leave your life,
but return to you in moments like these
not in messages,
not in calls,
but in the places
where your heart is still tender.
And tonight,
she returned.
Just to hug me.
Even if only in my mind.
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